bewildered man looking at camera while his wife sitting on couch depressed

Signs that indicate you are wasting your time with someone

Personal relationships are a mystery. There is no magic formula and, despite investing time and energy, they sometimes twist or do not take the appropriate drift. It is sometimes difficult to know why this happens.

But there are also cases where these doubts have a clear origin. And there are a number of signs that indicate this discomfort and can help you locate it.

There are circumstances that can become very complex and lead you not to know exactly if you are wasting time with someone or not. But, as we mentioned, there are some clear signals that can warn us that we are in a relationship that is really not convenient for us.

Lack of commitment

One of the signs that can lead you to think that you are wasting your time with someone who is not right for you is their lack of commitment. If the other party avoids conversations related to your future together or prefers to avoid long-term goals, this may be a clear sign that you are wasting your time. A solid and lasting relationship requires commitment and effort from both members.

No reciprocity

A healthy relationship is based on reciprocity between both parties, in which both a member and the other give and receive in an equitable way. If you feel you are giving everything on your part, putting effort, energy, time, and resources towards the other person without them doing the same, it is very possible that you are wasting time with them, as they are someone who does not value your effort.

Disrespect or emotional abuse

The fifth indication that you are wasting time with someone is one of the most obvious signs, and can be seen when there are disrespectful acts or emotional abuse. Respect between both parties is fundamental in any healthy relationship, so if you find that the other person humiliates you or subjects you to some kind of psychological abuse, you should stop investing your time with them.

Poor communication

One of the fundamental pillars of any relationship is communication. If there is poor communication between you, in which you have to constantly struggle to get it to be clear and open with the other person, or if you feel they do not listen or understand you, it is very possible that the other party is not as involved as you are.

Lack of interest in dreams and goals

A person who truly cares about you will be interested in your goals and dreams, and will also support you and help you to make them come true. If you feel that the other person hardly shows any interest in your aspirations and does not encourage you to achieve what you are looking for, it is one of the indications that can lead you to think that you are wasting time with them.

Remember that you deserve a relationship where you feel respected, supported and valued. Therefore, in the presence of one or more of these signals, it is advisable to reflect and reconsider whether it is really worth continuing to invest your time at their side.

The keys to having a healthy couple relationship

Once you have clear the signs that can indicate if you are wasting time with someone, it is advisable to remember the keys that you should keep in mind to be able to enjoy a healthy couple relationship, and these are the following:

  • Love from freedom: it is necessary to be clear in a couple that one does not belong to the other, and that each person is the one who must freely decide to maintain a relationship with you and leave if they so consider. This means that everyone must have their private space, their intimacy.
  • The importance of communication: good communication is one of the fundamental pillars of a couple, as it is what allows to create a life in common. It is recommended that the discussions be constructive, showing how one feels and avoid accusing the other, in addition to discussing only one topic at a time.
  • Share quality time: it is important that the couple share quality time, sharing hobbies and moments together, such as weekend getaways, going out for dinner or eating, going to the cinema, etc.
  • Never stop caring for the relationship: it is common for each person to show the best part to the other at the beginning of the relationship, being detail-oriented, saying compliments, etc. However, over time it is also common for these gestures to be less frequent or even disappear. For this reason, you should never stop caring for your relationship.
  • Respect and trust: respect and trust are two of the most important elements to enjoy a healthy couple. You must respect and trust the other person, because that is what love is about. Relationships that are based on jealousy and lack of respect are doomed to failure, especially if there are cases of infidelity.
  • Don’t change the other person: a common mistake is to try to change the other person, but a person only changes when they really want to change or when their environment changes. For this reason, if at some point you want your partner to change, the best thing you can do is to change yourself.